


Over My Shoulder

by actmademoiselle



Category: Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them (Movies), Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Always, M/M, Stream of Consciousness, albus loves gellert in canon now, guys I love tempted-by-the-dark albus, he is soooo shady, severus is in this for like a second, the mirror of erised - Freeform, vague mention of voldemort
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-09
Updated: 2018-10-09
Packaged: 2019-07-28 20:24:27
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,136
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16249157
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/actmademoiselle/pseuds/actmademoiselle
Summary: Ever since I saw the latest trailer for the new Fantastic Beasts the scene where Jude Law looks into the Mirror of Erised and sees Gellert, while saying "I cannot move against Grindelwald", has kept going on in my mind. It's finally officially canon! So I had to write a short piece about Albus's feelings towards Gellert before his death. This is a stream of consciousness, a quick look at the moments throughout the seven Harry Potter books that would bring Dumbledore's mind back to Grindelwald. It starts with many people's favourite quote, Snape's Always. This piece is more about emotion than plot tbh. Enjoy!--------------------Always, Snape answers Dumbledore’s question, and the old man is silenced. The Master of Potions leaves thinking that he opposed the principal, but Albus’s mind is understanding. Always he knows. Always he can imagine. Always he is reminded of every year when the Nurmengard prison warden, unasked, sends a letter updating him of the state of one of the prisoners. Dumbledore never asks, but he always opens the letters.Always is like a mantra in his head ever since he heard it. His entire being has never been described so succinctly and perfectly.





	Over My Shoulder

_Always_ , Snape answers Dumbledore’s question, and the old man is silenced. The Master of Potions leaves thinking that he opposed the principal, but Albus’s mind is understanding. _Always_ he knows. _Always_ he can imagine. _Always_ he is reminded of every year when the Nurmengard prison warden, unasked, sends a letter updating him of the state of one of the prisoners. Dumbledore never asks, but he always opens the letters.

 

Always, the school letters they send to first years seem to whisper, when he sees Bathilda Bagshot on the reading list.

Always, the place where James and Lily Potter go to live sings when they ask him to become their Secret Keeper. He refuses. Nothing good has ever happened in Godric’s Hollow for him.

Always, Cornelius Fudge unknowingly says every time he pesters him about taking over as Minister.

Always, the wand between his fingers screams.

Always, always, always, it shouts.

Always, every time he welcomes the first years.

Always, every time he sees the sign of the Deadly Hallows.

Always, whenever he sees the name Beedle.

Always, the inquisitive eyes of Tom Riddle.

Always, Severus Snape’s obsession.

Always, always, always.

 

Harry Potter comes to Hogwarts and Dumbledore must find out who the boy is. Twice now Dumbledore has misjudged a person because of their intelligence and power and dedication. He will not have a third Dark Lord on his conscience. He finds the Mirror of Erised in the depths of the Room of Requirement where he hid it decades ago, scared. He finds it and brings it out and gives the boy invisibility and direction. Harry Potter sees his dead parents in the Mirror. He asks Dumbledore about his visions and all Albus can come up with is a piece of clothing. What could he say? That for him the image has never changed, as it probably never will for Harry?

When Dumbledore looked in the Mirror for the first time he was a boy after summer vacations and a revelation. The next time was a decade later when he wanted to confirm he could face the Dark Lord of his times, and failed, and rushed to stash the Mirror where its truths would be long hidden and forgotten. The next time is now. It is the same, always. It is a boy. It is a man. He looks at Dumbledore and understands him.

A letter comes from Nurmengard. Albus opens it, reads, and burns. Harry Potter wakes from his coma. The boy will never be tempted by the dark and that already makes him stronger than Albus.He should take the Mirror back into the oblivion, but before he goes, he looks into it again, in hope. It is still the same.

 

The Chamber of Secrets is open and people are dying and Cornelius Fudge asks him about becoming Minister. Lucius Malfoy shows his blonde hair when he asks him to retire, smiling. Harry Potter proves his loyalty to Dumbledore so far the phoenix flies to save the boy, and it makes Albus glad, but then, for a moment, for a second, he remembers another boy who was loyal to him.

A letter from Nurmengard comes like every year. Dumbledore doesn’t even know why the guardremembers to write them.

 

Sirius Black escapes Azkaban and there is so much talk about prisons and Godric’s Hollow, Dumbledore’s heart is broken for the entire year.

The letter comes. The prisoner is well.

 

There is a delegation from Durmstrang at Hogwarts.

 

He’s in the Room of Requirements looking for a horcrux but he stumbles onto the Mirror by accident. It must’ve moved itself somehow. He knows he shouldn’t, but he lifts the curtain for a moment. The prison letters are not pictures, after all; he has no pictures.

 

They are at war, again; will they ever not be at war?

 

He finds the horcrux in the run-down cottage and puts it on without question, without thought, without delay; his greatest regret could be undone in a second. Only afterwards, when he calms down, he realises it could never have worked. He remembers the Mirror of Erised, the Mirror of Desire; his greatest regret is that his sister is not his greatest regret.

He has two of the Hallows now. Gellert is with him every day, like a shadow over his shoulder, always in the corner of his mind. Sometimes Harry brings his Invisibility Cloak with him and Dumbledore’s bones ache with old desire of the Hallows. They are all in the same room.

 

He cannot, he will not, he cannot.

 

He is dying.

 

He cannot, he will not.

 

Severus Snape tells him Draco Malfoy is meant to kill him.

 

He looks at Harry Potter and he sees the noble man the previous two boys never became. He is proud; he is jealous.

 

He shall not.

 

It is only fitting he would.

 

He shall not.

 

There is a letter. The prisoner has fallen sick, but it is nothing to worry. Simply a cold.

 

Ronald Weasley almost dies because of a poison meant for him and Albus realizes how near his death is. He watches his phoenix rebirth itself and he’s grateful he himself is not condemned to immortality. _Always_ is like a mantra in his head ever since he heard it. His entire being has never been described so succinctly and perfectly. _Always_.

 

Always, always, always.

 

He will be dead soon.

 

He goes to Nurmengard. He stands in front of the building and he can breathe freely for the first time in a long time.

 

He meets Gellert. The man is surprised; he looks different, much different that Albus imagined he would look now. There is, however, still that spark in his eyes, that spark that lets Albus know this is the very person he has come to see. He says nothing, at first, and then he only extends his hand to show the ring. Gellert understand perfecly.

He smiles at Albus; he smiles at Albus, Albus who has defeated him and put him in that cell, and yet Gellert smiles at him. Albus knows exactly why his reflection in the Mirror has never changed; this man is the only person that truly knows him. Fully knows what he is capable of; what he experienced; how deeply he can _desire_.

 

 _Have you seen the Cloak?_ , he asks.

 

 _Yes,_ Dumbledore answers, and he tells him _everything_.

 

He will be dead soon.

 

The wand falls from his hand when he falls from the tower, and he can see a shadow falling together with him. Always, he is reminded.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Voldemort finds Gellert Grindelwald in the damp corner of his prison cell and he asks him for the help in bringing about the world they both wanted. He asks him for nothing more than information. Grindelwald laughs in his face. Grindelwald dies.

 

Always.

 

 


End file.
